topic 46: HOW SEX CAN MAKE OR MAR YOUR MARRIAGE (EPISODE 1)

When matters concerning sex in marriage are addressed, many people tend to shy away from it because they believe it's not too decent to talk about it or it's too deep. According to research, 60% of marriages are broken because of sex issue.

Many marriages are at the verge of tearing apart because of this. Many couples are lamenting over this secretly but find it hard to seek for solutions because they feel embarrassed about it.

One of the major problems married couples encounter most especially in the first few years of marriage is "managing their sexual life". When

God created Man and woman, he told them "Be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth and subdue it". Is hope alive?

This is one of the reasons why marriage is essential as it is the only approved way for reproduction. But reproduction isn’t the only reason why couples should have sexual contact. Many couples are victims of sexual immorality due to the sexual problem they face with their spouse at home but this doesn't  and it wouldn't solve the problem.

Many women have chased their husbands away with words like "I'm tired", "Leave me alone!", "I'm not in the mood" etc.  As a wife, you need to understand that there are better ways of responding to your husband in such situations. You don’t need to hiss, shout or grumble because these are some of the things that makes a man feel bad and when this happens subsequently and continually, you are gradually chasing him outside to those "who are in the mood". Is hope alive?ma

Don't make the mistake of trying to "punish" your husband for what he might have done wrong by depriving him the chance to make love to you. When he offends you try to talk to him about it and get the problem solved.

Husbands, also needs to understand that when the wife isn’t giving you the sexual pleasure you desire, it doesn’t mean she is doing it on purpose by giving you flimsy excuses. The fact that she started the strange behavior suddenly should rather give you a concern. Ask yourself questions like: “what could be wrong? Have I done something to offend my wife? Is there something she is keeping from me? What can I do to solve the problem on ground”? 

Just keep answering as these humble and sensitive questions flow into your mind. Instead of making her feel bad about it or trying to claim your right, as most husband do say; "I'm the head of this home, so you can't deprive me of my right". All these wouldn't help in solving the problem; it instead escalate the already burning issue.

Try to let her feel close to you and accepted by you. Talk about joy, peace and experiencing these things together. Don’t give up on her because of her shortcomings. The same thing applies in situations whereby the husband isn't satisfying his wife’s sexual needs as usual. Going outside the boundary of your marriage is not the best way to solve or complement this. You have got to look for how to solve this maturely and with the respect for your marriage, your children and for God. The fact is nothing just happen. There must be a reason for something to happen, in as much as that thing never existed before. The REASON should be your first concern, and this should not be done by force or threat.

Watch out for the episode two.

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